College Football Team That Will Fall The Farthest This Year The Winning Isn’t Everything, It’s the Only Thing, Myth!

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The Winning Isn’t Everything, It’s the Only Thing, Myth!

This familiar quote has haunted me in all my years of coaching, and I suspect I’m not alone. If you are reading this and have no idea where this quote came from, let me give you a little background. The saying “Winning isn’t everything…it’s the only thing” is attributed to the legendary coach of the Green Bay Packers football team for more than 45 years, the man for whom the Super Bowl trophy is named; The great Vince Lombardi. News flash: He never said it; What he said “Winning isn’t everything – but wanting to win.” The incorrect quote comes from a Hollywood production starring John Wayne and Donna Reed titled “Trouble Along the Way” (Warner Bros. 1953) which was shot in black and white and was a story in which Wayne plays a coach and single parent with a daughter. At a private Catholic college and Donna Reed, a social worker concerned about the boy. In the film, a game is being played, while Donna Reed and the little girl are standing on a stand in one scene. The scene alternates between shots of Duke barking and kicking out his team while playing along, then two priests waving the school colors, and finally Donna Reed and a little girl who looks about 10-12 years old. the old Donna Reed is commenting to the girl that she hopes the kids are enjoying the game and giving it their all or something, when the little girl responds with the line….” Well you know what dads are (so and so ) always says….”Winning isn’t everything.” This line comes from a 10-year-old fictional character in a Hollywood production. How the line was credited to Vince Lombardi (due to his religious affiliation with some Catholic Church) and he He spent the rest of his life righting wrongs with sports commentators and writers until his last days.

I suspect, like many others, that this type of thinking, that winning is the only thing, dominates the way many coaches and parents view sports competition, and when our kids, our school team, or we don’t win every event. Then something must be wrong. Is it possible that either I, the parent, or I, the coach, can get more out of this moment in my moment of temporary trauma? In our society the idea of ​​always winning is such that we do all sorts of things to achieve it, ignoring our higher self. Sometimes, we are willing to do “whatever it takes” even if it is not the right thing to do. Still confused? Of course you are because unfortunately, once we remove the “winning is everything” mentality, we have to look elsewhere for the true purpose of these competitions. The answer I found in hindsight is not in my head. It’s really in the heart with a capital H and, I’ll come back to that in a minute.

If you look at winning and losing, the reality is that every time you step on the field, your odds are 50/50. It is a simple truth, the world as we perceive it is made up of sets of opposites, hot versus cold, up versus down, victory versus defeat, etc. Everything in creation is a world of duality. In fact, you cannot experience one without the other. Imagine living only in daylight? Just darkness? One compliments the other. It is not happiness without suffering. We don’t get to play the game without competition. So how do we walk in this world of duality? Moreover, where do we put our focus to succeed rather than fail? Also, more to the point, how do we participate in competitive sports? The answer lies in our higher consciousness. There is a large part of us that knows how to take all this duality and see what it is and what it is not. We are more than just winners or losers in this game! In fact, we are the creators of our destiny. And depending on how we notice and observe the workings of our own thoughts and the emotions they create, we can see the good in both winning and losing. We can experience both the good and the bad of winning and losing and never forget our true selves. This is not a new concept, eastern tournaments have been teaching this for thousands of years; They refer to their sports as “arts” like martial arts. The aim is not to exterminate or destroy opponents but to honor, respect and love them. A realization that without competition the artist would not want to show off the skills he has mastered. Competition is based on both competitors giving their best, giving 100% and enjoying the opportunity to compete. It is not in winning or losing but in competitions that a player/performer can demonstrate his mastery. Vince Lombardi corrected the famous fallacy “Winning isn’t everything – but wanting to win is.” There is a very subtle but powerful difference from winning. The difference lies in the power of our attention and intention. Why get involved unless you are performing to the best of your ability? Our intention should always be to try our best to win or succeed, however we don’t want to take it personally if we don’t get results on any given day. We give our best, learn from our mistakes and become better as we grow. I have a personal motto that goes like this: “Make it personal; don’t take it personal.” What I mean by this is that I want to do everything to the best of my ability, I want to make it my personal business to give everything I can, at the same time, remembering that it doesn’t matter if I succeed or fail. A true reflection of who I really am, it is the result of my best efforts at the time.

I can remember many times in my coaching career and my parenting career when both my son and I took lessons during his days as a peewee flag football player. In one season, he was included in a team that could not win a single game. He would complain on our rides home and at one point told me he didn’t want to play anymore. Having been there myself as a coach and player, I understood his pain, but I also knew that there was value in doing what he had to do and following through. After much discussion and persuasion on my part, he agreed to finish the season and give his best in any game regardless of the score. His team never won a game in the regular season, but lo and behold, a small miracle happened. When it came time for the playoffs, his team was able to succeed in two important games of the year. That’s right; They won the semifinals and the title matches. I took the opportunity to point out to my son that he would have missed out on being a champion if he had quit. We talked about how you never know how things will turn out if you keep your commitment and your word and give it your best.

Earlier I mentioned a Hollywood movie that created a very dangerous and unrealistic concept. Even Hollywood has created some very amazing and wonderful stories to inspire us. I just saw another movie about football called “Friday Night Lights”. It’s all about the highly competitive game of Texas high school football. The best part is the scene in the locker room at halftime of the “big game” when coach Gary Gaines starts talking about “being perfect,” the team’s reference for the season. He begins by telling the players to just forget about what’s on the scoreboard, forget about winning, and just get back on the field to give their best, give their all for each other, and do it with the love of their hearts. , and a sense of joy to play the game. He tells them how much he loves each of them and what he hopes they learn… if they play the game to the best of their ability and for all the right reasons, the final score is not their reward; The feelings they leave will be. The answer we all seek, we find in our hearts with a capital H. This is the true answer. In the game of football or the game of life, if we play our best, give our best and love what we do, it doesn’t matter what the scoreboard says, there are only winners and winners. Playing games for all the right reasons is key.

Finding and understanding the right reasons for competition has always been my biggest challenge every day, no matter the job. I live in this world and nature of duality; I prefer half of what constitutes my perception of reality. I just want to win, I just want to be happy, etc. The problem is that the more I get attached to what I want, the more I get attached to their opposite. Reality is a double-edged sword. The answer to this puzzle is not to add up, but to play the game in your head. You see, your head and your ego see and feel this duality, and it is your head that creates preferences based on all the information it has gathered over a lifetime of living in this opposite world. Individually winning and losing is your head; On the other hand your heart will just flow with the joy and love of playing the game. It’s love that drives you back to the game—time and time again—whether you’re winning or losing. In other words, love isn’t everything…it’s the only thing. Winning is a happy byproduct.

A few years ago when I was an assistant coach at the high school level; I was listening to our head coach talk to the players at halftime of a varsity basketball game. He told them they had to work hard, play smart, have fun and pull together to be winners. I thought that was very good advice. And as I listened to him talk about these ideas, I felt that before anyone could commit to all the hard work required to win, there had to be something else. The reason we become true winners and champions in sports and in life is that – aside from working hard, playing smart, having fun, etc. – we must truly love what we are doing.

If you love what you’re doing, it’s much easier to put in the work, bounce back from a loss, and show up to play again and again. It turns out, when you examine the mindset and heart of true champions (be it in sports or in life) how much they love what you see and hear from them. Whatever “it” is to them. All great champions have a basis in participating in their chosen endeavors. All great people have learned to play the game with their heart and use their head only as a compass – a tool to navigate their way to success. This is the most valuable lesson, sports and competition have taught me. This is the most valuable lesson we can teach our young players. “Winning isn’t everything – loving what you do means everything.”

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