Do You Have To Pay For A Scout For Football Divorce and Your Children

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Divorce and Your Children

The only thing children care about is that they feel safe and loved. Both are challenged when going through a divorce. No matter how much care and attention you put into supporting your children, some part of them will blame themselves for the divorce. Children often feel that the breakup is their fault. Your goal to help your children through this process is to begin healing in the pre-divorce process, before saying the words, “I want a divorce.” By building a strong foundation of love and support before the news breaks, you buffer your kids from some of the shocks that come with the transition from “mom and dad aren’t happy” to “mom and dad are breaking up.”

No matter how young or how old, there are three things your children need to know:

1) You love them unconditionally

2) You will never leave them, even if you are separated from your partner

3) The world is a better place and all experiences in life are opportunities to learn and grow

Once in the divorce process, this can be difficult to do because your energy is scattered all over the place. Anxiety, fear, and stress can be rampant during the divorce process, and your children will feel it. Reduce the impact by creating an atmosphere of love and trust during the transaction even if the marriage is difficult. This will give your children a sense of stability and security.

Most importantly, don’t focus on what you can’t do for your children (ie, “I can’t give them the family they’ve always wanted,” “I can’t be the ideal parent,” “I can’t. maintain a habitual lifestyle”). Focus on what you can do.

There are two things you can do to reduce the short- and long-term effects of divorce on your children:

1) Show your children real love through honest words and consistent, quality time. Bath time, bed time and meal time go a long way. Create a child-centered routine that allows you uninterrupted time with your children. Once the divorce proceedings begin, your mind will be elsewhere and the divorce settlement will result in fewer opportunities to spend time with your children (due to the new custody arrangement).

2) Go out of your way to know who your children are. It is something to listen to. There is another thing to listen to. Get to know your children personally. Ask questions and listen to the answers. Turn off the television, Blackberry/iPhone, cell phone, Twitter, turn off the computer and spend ten to twenty minutes a day asking your child questions.

1) What was the best part of your day?

2) How is the homework going?

3) Which friends did you talk to today?

4) Who is your favorite teacher and why?

5) What’s one fun thing you want to do this weekend?

Additionally, when was the last time you visited your child’s school? Do you know the names of all his teachers? Have you met the principal? Just because you stayed for the entire Cub Scout meeting? When you go to football games, are you watching your child or are you talking to your friends?

Remember: Your kids are watching you, even if you’re not paying attention.

Bottom line: Kids don’t remember the toys they got for Christmas or the square footage of your house. They remember the hugs, kisses and all the love you showed them throughout the year. That’s what they’re holding.

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